From Chaos to Calm: Navigating Stress Effectively

In this episode of the Inside OUT Podcast, Jojo delves into the pervasive issue of stress and how to navigate it effectively. She emphasizes the importance of morning routines, mindset shifts regarding time perception, and creating a calming evening environment to reduce stress levels. Jojo shares personal experiences and practical tips to help listeners cultivate a more peaceful and intentional life, encouraging them to challenge their current habits and embrace a stress-free existence.

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Transcript

Jojo (00:07.224)
Welcome to the Inside Out Podcast. I'm your host JoJo and this is where we'll navigate the mess together that is mental, emotional and spiritual. Let's get messy.

Jojo (00:27.278)
Hi everyone, welcome back to Inside Out. This week, I wanted to discuss the big S word, stress. I think everyone can relate when I say there's never enough hours in the day. I feel like I'm always stressed out. I feel like I never get everything done that I wanna get done. And I wanted to discover the gap between...

the life that we're intended to live, because I don't believe that we're supposed to be these stressed out human beings all the time and like running around like chickens with our heads cut off. I feel like there's a way in which we can actually, you know, start our day and have a very peaceful existence and not be kind of chasing the clock or having the clock chase us. So I've been doing a lot of thinking and a lot of internal

evaluation and examination on what stresses me out, where I feel like I lose track of time and when I don't feel like I'm getting enough done in my day. I've been talking to my friends. I've been talking to my family. I think it really comes down to a very simple mindset, which might sound kind of crazy, but let's explore this.

Let's start with waking up in the morning. When you wake up in the morning and you turn over and you immediately are like answering texts, answering emails, you already feel like you're in catch up mode. You already feel like you're behind because, my gosh, I've missed this text or this email, I have to do this or that. Your to-do list and your calendar are glaring at you literally in the early hours of the morning in that little blue screen in your face. First of all,

waking up like that is an automatic cortisol hit to your body, which we all know, but rarely do we do anything to change that. This might be a little difficult, but we are listening to this podcast. We're here because we want to reframe and advocate for ourselves and really change and challenge the ways that we've been living. And that doesn't

Jojo (02:46.456)
come easily. I started doing this thing and I started a few years ago, but it's gone in and out for me quite a bit where I keep up with it for a while and then I don't and it slips back and forth. But I've noticed because I've been doing it recently, how much peace and balance and lack of stress spikes I have throughout my day just from doing this simple thing in the morning. I got an alarm clock.

I got an alarm clock and I leave my phone out of my kitchen charging overnight and I set my alarm and I have my night away from my phone because it's so easy to roll over in middle of the night if you can't sleep and just, you know, pick up your phone, answer an email, see if you have any missed texts, scroll on social media, and that is going to completely throw off your sleep.

especially if you're scrolling on social media, all of these subliminal messages are coming into your head and making you probably spiral about gosh knows what and is taking you further and further away from sleep. And if you don't have enough sleep, your body is going to automatically be producing cortisol and stressing you out because it's trying to overcompensate for your lack of sleep. So leaving your phone out of your bedroom,

or just being like, no, I'm strict enough with myself that I'm not going to touch it. I'm not strict like that with myself. Like if my phone's there, I'm going to pick it up. That's why I have to like leave it outside my door. And there's no way in middle of the night, I'm going to get up and go get my phone because I'm too cozy and warm in bed. So that really creates the barrier for me to start building this habit for myself. Before I go to bed, I figure out what I have to do the next day, what time I have to be awake. I personally have a schedule that changes every single day.

So if I have to be somewhere at nine and I know I need a certain amount of time to get ready in the morning, I give myself an extra 45 minutes to an hour before I know that I have to leave my house. Because the worst thing you can do in the morning is be rushing because then you're automatically already behind your own schedule. This is super easy. And you might be like, well then I...

Jojo (05:06.412)
need to like sleep more. I can't get up that early. need to, know, whatever it is, stop making excuses. Excuses end today. You want to change your life? This is how you do it. You want to change your reality? This is how you do it. Set that alarm clock 45 minutes before and give yourself that space in the morning to not be running to pick up your phone, to not be scrolling through social media.

to wake up slowly, that you don't have to jump out of bed and feel like you're racing time. The amount of peace that I've had in the mornings just from leaving my phone, waking up slowly, I am that person that meditates and I do try to journal in the morning. I don't do it every single morning, but it's definitely top of mind that I want to be someone who does this more and

I was actually gifted this beautiful gratitude journal and that is something that I am implementing into this morning routine. And like I said, this morning routine is in and out, but I want to be changing my life just as much as you guys want to be changing yours. I'm a constant work in progress. Nothing that I'm saying is stuff that I'm just preaching. It's stuff that I'm working on in myself as well.

I definitely don't do this all the time. I just noticed that when I do these things, how much my life actually changes and my reality shifts. So everything that I talk about typically on this podcast is very much from a lens of these are challenges and these are things that I'm going through in real time. And I don't know if everything will work. I don't know if this is going to be something that continues to stick, but right now this is what I'm working with.

When I wake up in the morning and I meditate, I also do this thing where I speak out loud. I've talked about this in previous episodes, but yes, I am the crazy girl that walks down the street talking out loud. And yes, I am the girl that wakes up in the morning and speaks out loud to her ceiling or the universe or the creator or whatever you want to call it. But I really find that when I speak out loud, it really grounds me and settles me into the day of my intentions, where I'm at.

Jojo (07:34.082)
The things that I'm thinking about, the things that I want to be cleared up, and I'm not bouncing that off of anyone. I'm creating that own internal dialogue and figuring out where I feel and where I stand and what I think about certain things. So that's one of my processes. Obviously, if you have a partner or roommates or whatever it is, maybe you don't want to like wake up and speak out loud to your ceiling. That might be a little strange.

to each their own. Right now, this is just something I do. And maybe one day I will have a meditation corner and I'll do this in the corner and not disturb anyone. But having that buffer of time in the morning where I can have that peace, that time away from my phone, have my espresso, have my water, have my vitamins, do the things that make me feel good in the morning, stretch, get into my body, get into my mind.

really sets me up for a very intentional and grounded day. So that when that hour that I could have gotten up hits, that's when I turn on my phone, but I'm already awake and not racing the clock. And then when that external stimuli starts coming at me, whether it's a text from someone or a, Hey, can you do this? Or the things that would necessarily stress me out because I've balanced out my equilibrium.

from the minute I wake up, I have a way better cadence through my morning that carries out through my day because of the right foot that I've started on. I have a girlfriend who has this insane alarm clock and it literally goes, and it's like, how on earth do you wake up to that? And I understand some people need that, but that to me is a complete shock of my system. I need something that

slowly wakes me up, it gets a little louder, but it's not like pulling me directly out of my sleep cycle and into chaos. Because that's how it feels. We were traveling one time and this alarm went off and I couldn't fall back asleep for hours because of how much that jolted my nervous system. And it's the same thing in the morning. If you're just jolting awake and

Jojo (10:02.274)
responding to messages and running throughout your day and my gosh, jumping in the shower and running out the door. It's like you're not setting yourself up for any sort of success. And that tiny little bit in the morning that just puts space between you and the outside world and lets you drop into yourself is really the game changer that you need throughout your day.

because it really just sets you up for success. Another way to have this groundedness and this ease and lack of stress throughout your day is this simple sentence. And that sentence is, I have all the time in the world. It really lets you drop into the moment. Now, if you don't believe me, just try it. It sounds a little kooky. Great. I love kooky. Recently,

I was out with some girlfriends and we were going to go see a show and we were trying to get dinner before and we had about an hour and a half from the time we were supposed to having dinner to curtain. And we tried to go to one sushi spot and the restaurant was full. We didn't have reservations because it was kind of like a last minute thing. And we like ran around the corner to the other one. There was a line out the door. We did have a reservation.

at this spot, but there was still like maybe 10 or 15 people in front of us trying to like get to their reservation as well. And then the theater was like a 10 or 15 minute walk. anyway, we really only had 45 minutes in this restaurant from the time we showed up to like getting to where we needed to be. And one of my girlfriends was a little bit stressed about that. When you're constantly thinking about the time, you're not actually present. Your body isn't.

obviously stress mode, and it also just takes everyone else around you out of the experience that you're having. When you're supposed to be having a good time, a fun night, a dinner with your girlfriends, whatever it is, if you're constantly worrying about the next thing, you're just missing your entire life that's playing out in front of you. And I looked at her and I said, look, we have all the time in the world. And then I added in the next 45 minutes.

Jojo (12:26.882)
Just take a breath, drop into the now. 45 minutes can be the longest amount of time. A minute can feel like eternity sometimes. 45 minutes can go like that. It just depends on how you relate to time. And if your body's in the constant stress mode, time is just going to keep ticking and you're just going to get lost in it. And I said, do me a favor, just humor me, forget about it. We're going to make the show.

We're going to have dinner. Time is going to be on our side. Just forget the clock for a second and just drop into the here and now." And she did. And honestly, we had such a fun dinner. It was delicious. We showed up to the show 15 minutes to go. We were able to grab a little glass of wine and a drink and a snack before we sat down and enjoyed the theater. But just having that mindset throughout the day,

Even if you're running from appointment to appointment or meeting to meeting or whatever it is, even if you've time blocked your calendar where you're like, I only have this amount of time to do this task. Why is there a negative connotation over, I only have this amount of time? Reframe it. I have this amount of time to get this done. Amazing. You have that amount of time. That's an amazing amount of time. Even if it's

Five minutes for a phone call. Great. Make those five minutes so intentional and so present. Even if it's 30 minutes for lunch, sit down and savor every bite and really be focused on the fact that you're eating that meal and what that nutrition is doing for your body to fuel you through the rest of your day. Stop worrying about, my God, 25 minutes. Because the cortisol in your body is just going to fight everything.

that you're doing and it's actually breaking down your body in a very negative way. And if you're trying to eat while you're stressed, your body actually can't absorb the nutrients. I have to run around all day long in New York between subways and clients and I'm just all over the place all the time. typically I only have 30 minutes to get from one side of town to the other. But instead of seeing that as

Jojo (14:51.504)
my God, I only have 30 minutes. I started seeing that as I have 30 minutes. I have all the time in the world in the next 30 minutes to get from Times Square to Tribeca. And in those 30 minutes, I'm going to look around. I'm going to enjoy my surroundings. I'm going to enjoy the subway if I possibly can. And I'm really just going to be present because when you're constantly checking the time and pulling yourself out of the now, you're just going to continue that vicious loop.

The evening is also a really important time to be cognizant of your stress levels because if you're coming off of a crazy morning to a stressful day to coming home to then having to wind down and go to sleep to then do it all again, you're just perpetuating a vicious cycle. But if you're cognizant from the minute you open your eyes throughout your day to when you get home and when you start winding down and going to sleep, you're gonna have way less stress in your body and more of a capacity

to do this over and over and make this your norm. Because it's not normal to be stressed out all the time. It's not normal to go to work and be like, all day long. It's not normal to get aggravated by little tiny things because our tension in our body and our hypertension is just so high. That's not normal. We normalize it because everyone is this way. But what if we're not? What if we actually just

change this, reframe it, redo it, and do it better. Because if we want to live stress-free, harmonious, peaceful, lovely lives, we've got to start doing this internally so that it affects our external. We've got to start doing this from the inside out. How many people do you know that are just a ball of stress all the time and you could say the smallest thing to them and they just explode and you're like, whoa, dude.

What? Hello? And you like don't know what side of them you're going to get and they're so volatile, then it literally has to do with the amount of stress. What if controlling your own stress and your own narrative and your own life starts to influence the people around you? I I'm a work in progress on this, but I'm doing this and I'm noticing how it's affecting the people around me. If I'm more balanced walking into a meeting,

Jojo (17:18.818)
and I'm more calm, the person opposing me naturally feels that vibration and drops in and is also more calm. Or if I say the smallest things like, Hey, we got all the time in the world in the next five minutes. It's okay. We'll figure it out. It really lets them breathe and be like, okay, wow, we actually do have, we have five minutes. We don't only have five minutes. have, we have five minutes. So much can happen in the smallest amount of time. So in the evening, when you get home,

and you're winding down going to bed. Do the same thing with your phone, but on the backside of your day. Put your phone away an hour before you need to go to sleep. What happens then? no, you don't scroll on TikTok for 8,000 years. That's a good thing. Just get back into yourself. Quiet the noise around you. Create that space, create that separation and just drop in to your night. Pick up a book, take a bath.

Light some candles, put on some calming music, put on a TV show, do something for you that isn't revolving around the external world. Also, I know this is common sense, but it's not normal for us always to be in contact with everything around us. That's so weird, but it's so normalized. The problem with modern society really is this gap.

between how we really want our lives to be and how they're actually going. And these little tiny ways to reframe it can really change your entire existence. And they're so simple. So I challenge you to all do this mentally. Identify where your stressors are. Do you relate to anything that I'm saying? Emotionally. Emotionally identify with what your stressors are. And spiritually doing these little things and really understanding

how you have such a big impact over the way that you perceive time is spiritually just going to rewire your entire life. You're going to be way more grounded, way more attentive, way more intentional, way more available, way less stressed. I mean, that's the whole point, right? And I'm not going to go off on a tangent on all of the health risks that stress causes. I'm not sure where I heard this, but

Jojo (19:42.582)
Stress is probably the most chronic illness, let's call it, or disease in the world. It's the number one thing that leads to most health conditions. We have the ability to stop that with very, very easy, simple tools that really just are going to eliminate so many issues in the future with ourselves, with our relationships, with our bodies, with...

everything and everyone around us. So just remember you have all the time in the world. Keep telling yourself that motto. Keep reframing the way that you think about the timing in your day and create those buffers for yourself. Give yourself those boundaries so that you can start and end your day from a place of ease and peace. And with that,

Thank you for going inside out with me today. I hope that this offers you a different perspective and challenges the way that you start and end your day and gives you a little bit more ease and freedom and breath in your day. So please live more stress-free. Just try it. Try it for a week. If it doesn't work, well, you tried. This is only one of the options. It's an option that works for me.

I'm noticing it work for others. If you identified with this podcast and you think this would be helpful for someone you know, please send it to that person and don't forget to rate, subscribe on Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts, follow along on Instagram at underscore inside out dot podcast. And I will see you all next week. Have a stress free week. Bye.